For [personal profile] candor1

Jul. 17th, 2019 01:40 pm
open_rebellion: (12 we are stardust)
[personal profile] open_rebellion


Poss. stuff in the lull between Death Star 1 blowing and the Battle of Hoth:
• Jyn+Cas (and however many of the others we want) survive Scarif; as soon as they get back to Yavin 4, Cas is stuck in a bacta tank, and after a while in a medical coma, he finally wakes up—to find Jyn is still there…?
• Cas likes to climb the Massassi ziggurat, maybe Jyn climbs up one with him; and/or they go for a hike in the jungle…
• Alliance is looking to rehome survivors of Jedha and Alderaan, J+C could help survey planets…?
• Alliance needs more members, C sent back out as recruiter if Jyn wants to join…? (could involve being in a city together)
• reunite on Hoth after getting separated during the evacuation of Yavin…?

Anytime:
• the process of figuring out how to get these crazy kids to sleep in the same room (if they want to)
• they're already sleeping in the same room when one wakes the other with a nightmare
• something purely fluffy like realizing they both have atrocious eating habits, or one does and the other tries to help them with that
candor1: (Scarif . Jyn . the end)
From: [personal profile] candor1
They've stopped hurting: the cracked ribs, the concussion, dislocations, fractures; gotten by falling, made irrevocable by climbing… It was probably a bad sign, his body deciding there was no longer any point. If duration could have been a concern anyway. If he'd cared about anything, now, except giving the last of his focus, himself, to Jyn Erso

little galaxy of wiretaut strings transmuting his existence one more time—after saving him so many times already—to prop them both upright and take him in her arms: giving him one more purpose, even now, by needing him to hold her, too.

they'd never really clarified who was in command
which with this many variables should have become a problem for
someone
but never did because it was mutual they were so in accord
one commander in two people
following her finally allowing him to step on the path he'd never been able for just himself


Could they ever have gone somewhere with trees, traded weapons for tools, sat at last on a beach like this but it would only be the sunset that enveloped them, in the end…?

Didn't matter. He closed his eyes into her shoulder and her hair. He didn't want to see the shockwave. Not out of fear: Out of utter lack of interest. All he wanted to feel, to breathe, to know… in this far better death than he could ever have hoped for or accomplished on his own… With gratitude and a sense of utter peace for the first time in his life, he filled his senses with her.

He welcomed falling into the Force.

~

he walked with Baze, who guided him, pretending to be bored but really as captivated as he was by
Chirrut, who could see the molecules of the world and expounded on the Force with language too sensical and profound to be held in a conscious mind
and he knew they had loved each other and did still though they didn't walk in the world anymore

on the rain-soaked cliff with Bodhi, the only one of them who hadn't had everything taken but instead had given it up
and been betrayed by Saw—and any minute now, by Cassian—
and then not Bodhi at all but… Tivik?
…no: Galen Erso; who looked at him with such burden and sadness, slipped a knife in his side to open his ribcage,
hook him up by veins and wires to Kaytoo, to keep him alive until Jyn could get there and detonate them all

being approached by Draven and Mon Mothma, who told him his next assignment was to die, but they'd do him the honor and service of dissecting him themselves; as Kaytoo held him up from behind

screaming at Kay not to leave him alone

in the elevator with Jyn, seeking the galaxy they'd saved and would never have again in one another's eyes; seeing everything she'd had stolen from her and wishing so badly he could give it back; but still, it was so good to be with her and be finished


~

How scarred he was under his clothes was probably no surprise. (Dusting of shrapnel over one shoulder onto his back; hollow of shoulder and chest and low on ribs shiny with blasterburn; knife lines in forearm and near collarbone; callouses from restraints on both wrists; some nearly-bacta-erased symmetrical surgical lines; raised mottling down his side going under his waistband, like someone had tried to dig something out of his side using an instrument not meant for it, but what really made it the worst was that it was stretched. He'd gotten it before he was finished growing.)

All in all: little surprise that he woke with a start and reaching for a nonexistent weapon.
Edited Date: 2019-07-18 03:34 am (UTC)

Date: 2019-07-18 04:25 am (UTC)
candor1: (Scarif . i love you don't die)
From: [personal profile] candor1
Her hand met his. Just with that, his brain… landed.

For another moment, he still didn't know where (or when) he was. But she was there. Everything else was negotiable: she was there.

His fingers curled on hers. His voice came out raspish, denatured, but hopefully sufficient: "Jyn…"

Date: 2019-07-18 04:04 pm (UTC)
candor1: (Yavin . couldn't face myself . smile)
From: [personal profile] candor1
He held on.

He stared at her face like he was trying to reconcile strange readings, or read an unlabeled map, or interpret Shriiwook… but also not like any of that because of how seeing her face made his… shine…

What could he say to her…?

…Unfortunately, something occurred to him. Some of the light fell from his face, though his eyes never left hers, as he managed: "Where are we? …The others?"

Date: 2019-07-18 04:31 pm (UTC)
candor1: (Eadu . i can't . down)
From: [personal profile] candor1
He looked at her steadily, then let his eyes fall closed.

Sefla. Melshi. Basteren. Calfor. Eskro. Farsin. Jav. Pao. Rostok. Stordan.

Rook. Malbus. Îmwe.


He wondered if there was anyone else alive who knew exactly which names were on that list.

Kaytoo.

I'm sorry. I loved you. I'm sorry.


He'd remember.

Whether he ever shared that list or not, depended on… how they proceeded to be…

judged?

remembered.

He opened his eyes to hers again. "Did it work?"

Date: 2019-07-18 05:19 pm (UTC)
candor1: (candid . file . plans)
From: [personal profile] candor1
His head came a little off the pillow at that. "It's gone?" He'd been hoping against hope the plans had gotten out. (Do you think anyone's listening?) He hadn't tried to think so far ahead as to someone acting on them…!

He squeezed her hand back. And though his job usually involved being able to get meaning without its explicit transmission, there were some things you had to hear spelled out. "Destroyed?"

Date: 2019-07-19 12:24 pm (UTC)
candor1: (Yavin . couldn't face myself . smile)
From: [personal profile] candor1
He set back his head, because she told him to, though he didn't quite relax.

But that was okay. A sudden smile bloomed on his face.

"Good," he said. Understatement of the millennium.

His thumb moved on the back of her hand, consciously or un-. "And you're still here."

Date: 2019-07-19 05:39 pm (UTC)
candor1: (Yavin . what we need)
From: [personal profile] candor1
Maybe a bit too fast and emphatic: "Yes." The second, regaining some composure: "Yes, of course."

I don't know what I would have done if I'd woken up and you weren't.

He quietly breathed through his nose and got a grip; and frowned a little at the other thing she'd said: "Wasn't that your bargain with Mon Mothma? Help us and you'd go free?"

—Not that he wanted her to go. He just wanted it to be her free choice, if to stay.

Date: 2019-07-21 07:09 am (UTC)
candor1: (R1 . some of us just decided)
From: [personal profile] candor1
He gave a slight, mirthless smile. "Technically, I did that." Not to take credit—it had absolutely been following her light—but in terms of the one who'd sworn oaths and had the actual authority over the others. "And, technically, we weren't expressly forbidden. The mission was unsanctioned. It didn't go against preexisting orders. I left that meeting before anyone with the authority to give me new ones would have the chance. It was also undertaken in the face of the Council's proposal to disband the Alliance and surrender to the Empire. You know what would have happened to all of us without you?"

Date: 2019-07-21 09:01 pm (UTC)
candor1: (Yavin . you kill him)
From: [personal profile] candor1
Nothing good. Indeed. It ran through his head nonetheless:

Known leaders like Mon Mothma, Bail Organa, Dodonna, Raddus, Draven, would be imprisoned and executed. The traitor Bodhi Rook would be turned over as a condition of surrender and made a painful example of. The Guardians and most of the SpecForce volunteers would refuse to cooperate and keep fighting, but without the resources of the Alliance, mainly they'd be finding a more palatable way to die. In order to keep K-2SO from being restored to factory spec and turned back into an Imperial weapon, Cassian would destroy him, himself; then also join the Guardians.

It doesn't matter. She already knew or didn't need to hear. You were still out. And then what she'd said before, belatedly catching up to him: they said you were alive. He looked at her, feeling his heart pound a little more. "You stuck around… for me?"

Date: 2019-07-22 04:44 am (UTC)
candor1: (NiJedha . stop right there)
From: [personal profile] candor1
His heart was right there with hers. His eyes fell to their still-joined hands; wondering if he dared to keep holding on, not at all prepared to let go.

"…and now?" he said at last. His mouth was dry. It wasn't fair of him to put all the answers on her; at the same time, felt he needed further information before figuring out what on Fest to say or do, himself.

Date: 2019-07-22 04:14 pm (UTC)
candor1: (NiJedha . stop right there)
From: [personal profile] candor1
He nodded slowly. Looked once more at their hands; made himself let hers go. "Well, thank you. I'm glad you're here. …If I can help at all with figuring out what comes next."

Date: 2019-07-24 12:57 am (UTC)
candor1: (NiJedha . he is taking us to--)
From: [personal profile] candor1
"I know what happens to me. Victory transmutes sin. If I'm courtmartialed, Draven will testify on my behalf. I may get demoted but I don't think I'll be imprisoned. I don't mind getting demoted." And of course, whether he'd stay with the Alliance or not wasn't even a question.

—Or was it? because his eyes were on hers again and what he said next was— "I know I don't need to worry about you. You can take care of yourself. But… do you have to, this time? Couldn't we… I thought… we were a good team. I'm… I'd… if there's any way… the prospect of going back to… being without that…

"Things are different now, for me. I don't want to go back to how I was before. Even if I could. And a big part of that… was getting to… work… with you.

"What you do next needn't have anything to do with me. But what I do next… if… you're… okay with it… I'd kinda like to have something to do with you."

Clear as mud? Roger. But the look on his face and in his eyes was a little clearer.

Date: 2019-07-24 02:37 am (UTC)
candor1: (candid . smile . at Flick)
From: [personal profile] candor1
A smile broke onto his face. Parts glad, hopeful, and relieved. (It crinkled his eyes pleasantly, as before. Unlike before, it also made him look younger.) He felt idiotic for letting go of her hand, but ah well. "Okay. …Thank you." And the Force.

Date: 2019-07-24 04:26 am (UTC)
candor1: (NiJedha . Jyn . smile . built on hope)
From: [personal profile] candor1
(Right there with you. He hadn't fumbled for words that badly when he'd had a hand in an interrogation droid and a blaster in his face.)

Her touch did something hard to pinpoint but tangible to his smile. He again crooked a finger to brush hers, back. Gently, with humor; also genuine regard—how entirely ready he was, any time, to follow her lead: "Yes, ma'am."

Date: 2019-07-29 03:10 pm (UTC)
candor1: (Cadera . escapology . down)
From: [personal profile] candor1
He didn't have the capability for anything right now except honesty; and that was all that was in his voice. "I'm not."

No… he really wasn't.

What he was was starting to drift off again.

Date: 2019-07-30 11:48 pm (UTC)
candor1: (Scarif . datacore . evasive . down)
From: [personal profile] candor1
The squeeze of her hand made him feel safer and more comforted than any amount of painkillers. His fingers tightened for a moment on hers, back; and, per orders, he put back his head and closed his eyes.

Though his grip was gentle, she could move away the instant she wanted to, this time he didn't let go of her hand.

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Jyn Erso

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